What If

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is 0

As published on LinkedIn Influencers on November 7th, 2019.

I don’t remember who first told me about the poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling, but it was when I was in high school, some 40 odd years ago. Soon after I typed it out on my typewriter, I folded it neatly and carried it around in my wallet. Every home I have lived in, every office I have worked in, I have had this poem somewhere on the bulletin board. It remains my go to poem to this day. It is who I aspire to be in this world.

Why am I posting this today? Because over the past few weeks I have been re-entering the world post my gap year of sorts. It feels like a new beginning. A new chapter. And front and center is not only WHAT I will be doing, but HOW I will be doing it. The below is a great framework for the how.

Calm. Kind. Confident. Patient. Honest. Humble. Grateful. Thoughtful. Risk-taking. Reflective. Resilient. Generous. Inclusive.


If – By Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936)

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

 But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

 Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or, being hated, don’t give way to hating,

And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;

If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with triumph and disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,

And stoop and build ’em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

 And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on”;

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with kings—nor lose the common touch;

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;

If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run—

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,

And—which is more—you’ll be a Man (Woman/Person) , my son (Daughter/Child)*!

* My Additions

If you have a favorite poem please share. Have a great day.

Finding a Job Post Graduation

As published on LinkedIn Influencers on July 27th, 2019.

Last month I watched as my oldest child graduated from college. Yes, my son is now officially a college graduate, and no, I don’t know where the time went. What I do know is that I am one proud mother. My son is in full-time job search mode, and watching him go through this process has been eye-opening for me. I’ve been trying to offer advice, but it has been 30 years since I was in his shoes looking for my first job, and a lot has changed since then. That being said, it’s also remarkable how much has remained the same.

When I graduated from the University of British Columbia back in 1988, I was lucky because I knew what I wanted to do: enter a career in finance. I was also very lucky in that a number of firms, including Goldman Sachs, came to my campus to recruit. That made everything a lot easier. When a graduate takes a well-trodden path, such as banking or consulting, a university can be a big help. But if you’re taking the path less taken, not so much. It makes me wonder whether universities are ranked in some way by the support they give in helping their graduates find work. If not, they really should be, especially considering the investment these young people are making in their education. You would think that that would be an important benchmark.

Regardless, my son is not heading down a well worn path, and naturally, I want to help. But, and I can’t stress this enough, I want to help in a positive way. A recent study revealed that 40% of employers have had parents interfere in their child’s career. Employers have reported parents submitting resumes on their child’s behalf, calling the company to lobby for their child to be hired, and even sitting in on their child’s job interview. If you are a parent, do not, I repeat, DO NOT be one of these parents. Not only does it reflect badly on your child, but studies have shown that these helicopter parenting tactics do more harm than good. Give advice, sure, leverage your network, sure, but then let your child figure out their own path.

For myself, I decided that my way of helping and giving advice would be to do some research on the current job market and strategies on how to get a job in today’s connected world. Hopefully I can give him some helpful information and he can take it from there. Given my inclination to share, share, share, below is what I have learned. I invite you to have a read, and please share your favorite tips and resources in the comments below for all graduates to read and use.

First, some stats.

According to the National Center for Education Statistics, American colleges and universities will award 1.0 million associate’s degrees, 1.9 million bachelor’s degrees, 780,000 master’s degrees, and 182,000 doctor’s degrees for the 2018-2019 school year. 

At the same time, 19.9 million students were projected to attend American colleges and universities in fall 2018. My youngest child will be one of them. 17 million students will enroll in undergraduate programs, with 2.9 million enrolled in post-baccalaureate programs.

Your first job matters. According to a 2018 study by the Strada Institute for the Future of Work, 43% of college grads take positions that don’t require a degree. This study also found that 10 years after graduation, 1 in 5 college grads still weren’t working in a position that required a degree, meaning that once you’re underemployed, it can be extremely difficult to get out of that hole. This can impact your career and future earnings, so choose your first job carefully and strategically.

What about salary expectations? According to new data by College Pulse, analyzed by LendEDU, students expect to make $60,000 out of college, but in reality the average is $48,400. They analyzed over 7,000 responses from current college students from over 1,000 different schools for these numbers. Another study, the NACE’s Fall 2018 Salary Survey, stated that the preliminary average starting salary for the Class of 2018 graduates stands at $50,004, which is 2% less than the preliminary salary for the Class of 2017 ($51,022). This study also included eight main college degree categories and their estimated salaries, which would be worth benchmarking against in your own search for potential salaries.

Some good news. The unemployment rate for recent college grads was 3.7% in December 2018, just ahead of the overall 3.8% unemployment rate for the US at large. The job market, generally speaking, is strong. That said, somewhat alarming is the fact that when adjusted for inflation, the median earnings for recent grads today is no higher than for recent grads in 1990. With costs of living increasingly going up, that’s a worrying statistic for any parent. No wonder so many kids end up living at home for a while after graduating.

Know thyself.

It’s one thing to know what field you want to enter, but it’s another thing entirely to find the position that best suits your strengths and talents. One way to help this process along is to know just exactly what those strengths and talents are. I recently put in the time to more fully understand myself in this way, and it has been so helpful. Below are some of the tools that I would recommend for getting to know yourself better.

The Strong Interest Inventory is a good tool to help determine your work personality. It was first developed in 1927, and now has over 80 years of research behind it. This tool will help focus your job search on the positions and careers most tailored to your specific areas of interest.

Another great tool that I’ve personally used myself is StrengthsFinder 2.0 from Gallup. Similar to the Strong Interest Inventory, this is an assessment tool that helps to determine where your natural strengths and talents lie, as well as which areas need improvement and how to have more self awareness about both.

Job Sites

So now you understand what you want and what you might like to do. What’s next? How do you actually find a job? The good news is that there are a lot of big sites that amalgamate thousands of job postings, such as IndeedCareerBuilder, and Monster, meaning you have thousands of options at your fingertips. However, if these big sites seem overwhelming, the good news is that there are plenty of other sites that provide more targeted listings. Dice, for example, posts jobs specifically for those looking to enter the tech industry, while Cool Works specializes in outdoor job postings. One of the most highly recommended is The Muse, where they pair every job posting with insider information on what that company’s culture and employee experience is like. The Muse also has the largest database of career advice online, including career and coaching options.

Another great site is Idealist, which lists thousands of jobs for those looking to work in the non-profit sector. When I worked for Women Moving Millions, this was the site we used the most when recruiting. Finally, another great tool for recent grads is College Recruiter. This site is tailored specifically to graduates looking for their first job, and helps to identify good entry-level positions. There is even the opportunity for job seekers to have an expert critique their resume at no extra cost.

And of course, LinkedIn. It’s estimated that up to 70% of all job postings are never publicly published, meaning that your network of contacts is extremely important. Over the years, LinkedIn has become the top site for making business and career connections, so a professional, up-to-date LinkedIn profile is a crucial part of any job seeker’s inventory. LinkedIn also has a community of thousands of business professionals who publish daily content full of advice and practical knowledge. The site even has its own job board and listings, so when it comes to landing your first job, LinkedIn is an invaluable tool.

Some additional information.

According to Zippia, a company whose mission is to empower people with the information and tools needed to achieve their career aspirations, these are the “best” 10 entry-level jobs for college graduates in the United States:

  1. Cartographers and Photogrammetrists
  2. Computer Systems Analysts
  3. Management Analysts
  4. Web Developers
  5. Film and Video Editors
  6. Sales Engineers
  7. Technical Writers
  8. Arbitrators, Mediators, and Conciliators
  9. Multimedia Artists and Animators
  10. Credit Counsellors

Finally, I am a member of an awesome network called The Li.st, and I reached out and asked the members for some advice. Here are some highlights:

Nisha Chittal, Engagement Editor, Vox.com – As someone who’s done a lot of hiring of recent grads, my biggest tip is that cover letters are really important. We do read them. And in cover letters, candidates should demonstrate two things:

  1. Why you care about working at *this* specific company.  I see a lot of cover letters that aren’t tailored to the company and look like they could have been copy-pasted and sent to 100 different companies. This is not a good strategy. Most hiring teams want to know that you know something about their company, you understand what they do and what their mission is, and why you want to be a part of that mission. While copy-pasting the same cover letter 100 times might seem more efficient, you’d do better to take 10 minutes customizing your cover letter for each position and company you apply for — that will make you stand out far more.
  2. What value you would bring to the company. I also see a lot of cover letters, particularly from recent grads, that talk about how “this job would be the ideal opportunity for me to take the next step in my career.” While this is nice, what hiring managers really want to know is what value and skills you will bring to their company and how your skills will help them achieve their goals. So frame it the other way. Instead of talking about how this opportunity would be great for you, explain why you would be great for the position, and talk about what value you will bring and what you can help them do.

Nadja Blagojevic, Director of Content Strategy, Axiom – When I was a hiring manager, there were a bunch of traits that I would have LOVED to have seen in an entry level candidate. These were really basic qualities like being punctual, detail oriented, reliable, having a good attitude while learning the ropes, being organized, etc. I remember thinking that if I could find someone with those basic attributes, I would hire them in a heartbeat. For hiring at a junior level, I sort of assumed candidates were not going to actually know anything, and I would focus on hiring smart people who I could teach, and who would have a great orientation towards work and a learning mindset. 

Some other great books, articles, and resources from The Li.st members and others:

How to Win Friends & Influence People & How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age by Dale Carnegie

The 31 Most Common Interview Questions (and how to answer them) The Muse

The Best Cover Letter Examples for Every Type of Job Seeker The Muse

Your Step-by-Step Guide to Making the Perfect Resume (With Examples!) The Muse

16 Tips Every College Graduate Needs to Hear in 2018 Forbes

8 Ways Generation Z and Millennials Will Differ in the Workplace Forbes

I hope you found this useful, and remember, please feel free to add your tips in the comment section below. If you are looking for your first full-time position, good luck!

My Angel, Sadie.

As published on LinkedIn Influencers on May 19th, 2019.

If you are looking for an article about how to rock it in your career, the latest report on gender equality, or lessons learned from my years at Goldman Sachs, this is not it. This article is much more personal in nature, it’s about my grandmother. 


Today is my grandmother Sadie’s birthday. If she were still living, she would be 102 years old.  She did almost make it to 100, having passed away 5 years ago at the age of 97.  To say she was an amazing woman would be an understatement: she was pretty much perfect.

My sister and I were her first two grandchildren. Our parents would often take us to Vernon, a 30-minute drive from our home in Kelowna, British Columbia, to spend the weekends with her and our grandfather.   Although she worked during the week as a cleaning lady, when we visited, the weekends were all about us.  

She would take us to Polson Park where she would lay out a blanket so we could have a picnic lunch and eat her cucumber sandwiches. The afternoons would be spent swimming in the public park, chasing the geese around the pond, and playing hide-and-seek in the gardens.

We would go for walks in to town to have coffee with her friends at the 5 and dime, stopping at the candy store on the way home. At her home we would bake bread, and my favorite, cinnamon buns, her having risen early to prepare the dough and let it rise. 

If she did need to have some alone time, my sister and I would head to the basement and play grocery store for hours. Grandma would save the cans and boxes from various items, and we would play customer and cashier.  We were both well prepared for our future part-time jobs in retail. 

During the evenings we would take turns sprawling across her lap as we watched something on television. She would often have two sets of feet to rub, with my sister and I arguing about who was getting the better massage. When it came to rubbing our backs, we would count strokes to make sure we were each getting fair treatment.  We would often go to sleep with her in the middle, each of us nestled in to an armpit that smelled of love and safety.

There was only one time that I remember Grandma getting upset and spanking me. My sister and I were playing outside with the garden hose, spraying each other and running away. She thought it a good idea to run inside for safety, and I thought it was a good idea to follow her in with the hose at full throttle. It goes without saying that Grandma was not happy. I know for sure it hurt her more than it hurt me to get that spanking. She loved us unconditionally. 

This is only capturing the tiniest slice of the memories I have. Well, we have, as my sister helped with some recollections.  There are more memories about how she would come see us in Kelowna to help my mother with housework and laundry as she worked full-time, as did my dad. There is the making of traditional Ukrainian food with her, including cabbage rolls and pierogies.  And of course eating it all. And the endless card games and rounds of tile rummy we played. She loved to cheat by the way.  As I type, more and more memories are flooding back to me. And they are all good.  She was pretty much perfect. 

Of course I grew older, as did she, but we kept in regular contact over the phone, via letters (never email), and in person visits on my countless trips home. When I stopped working full-time and was able to spend summers in British Columbia with my children starting in 2002, we would regularly visit her, first in her home, and later in evolving levels of care facilities.  

Towards the end of her life, when she shared a room with other elderly people, our visits would usually occur in the common rooms. We would play tile rummy, drink tea, and I would enthusiastically humiliate myself just to make her laugh. Those visits got hard as we would have to leave her in the care of others, though awesome as they were, were not family. Moving in with my mom, who tended for her so well, and loved her to the moon and back, was not an option for her. She never wanted to be a burden. 

At Easter time in 2014, right before she passed, I thought it was a really good idea to bring along some bunny eared headbands. I hopped around entertaining the residents and made her laugh so hard I think she may have peed her pants.  I know I did. 

What I know for sure is that she prayed for her family every night. She prayed for our health, for our safety, for our happiness. She shared how she would name us all, one by one, her children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, and I never doubted the power of her prayers.   Of course we grieved her passing, but every member of her family, everyone who knew her, knew how lucky we all were for having her in our lives for so long. At 97, she was ready to go.

It was around that time that I started to see the numbers 111 or 1111, show up all the time. Back then, 5 ish years ago, when I saw them I would just make a ‘note to self ‘ on how odd it seemed. An example of this would be just glancing at my phone to check the time, and sure enough, 11:11.  Frankly I did not think anything of it until I saw a weird thing on a conference agenda, a session starting at 1:11 pm. I thought it was a typo and called it out to the organizer. She informed me that it was quite intentional, as there was a deep spiritual meaning to that number sequence. Say, what? I immediately googled it, and sure enough, this is what it said.   

Number 111 symbolizes the principles of spiritual awakening and enlightenment, high energy, inspiration and intuition, self-expression and sensitivity. Angel Number 111 is a message from your angels to be very aware of your persistent thoughts and ideas as these are manifesting quickly into your reality.

Holy shit. I immediately knew, just knew, that the 111s I had been seeing so many times, countless times, were indications of connection and love from my grandmother. I just knew it. She was my angel.  She was sending me messages, letting me know she was still there, praying for me, watching over me and my family.  Now I get that you might think this is a little wack-o-doodle but think what you will. 

But there is more to it. Unbeknownst to me, my daughter had also been noting seeing 111s all the time and not saying anything about it until one day, I said aloud, when I happened to glance at the clock at 1:11, and say “grandma.” She asked me what I was talking about, I shared, and she shared that she too had feelings about the significance of those moments but did not know what to connect it to. From that day forward, which was a few years ago, when we see 111s show up we say something aloud, we take a screen shot, we share, we connect and give thanks. 

But there is more too it. Today my grandma would have turned 102. Last night, having fallen asleep at 11 ish, dead tired, I woke up only to roll over and look at the clock, 1:11 am.  I do wake up a lot in the middle of the night, but not usually before 3 am. This was very unusual. 

So I know this. I know I was blessed to have had a truly incredible grandmother who graced my life with her love, her compassion, her cooking, her generosity, her wisdom and so much more. I know she is still somewhere, continuing to watch over me and my family. There are angels, and one of their names is Sadie Malysh.